User blog:LakuitaBro01.2/The Adventures of Chatzy Episode One - Don't Worry Guys, the King has a Plan!
THE FIRST EPISODE IS HERE! This is the first story I've written in a while and I promise this will be the shortest episode out there as I'm about to go places in an hour and I'm trying to get back into the swing of things. Here it is! BOOM (The setting is a small town located on the Eastern Coast of the United States. In this town, there is a tower on a cliff. No one in this town knew where the FUCK they were so every few seconds of their existence upon entering this town; they would question where they were. Of these inhabitants included Shovel Knight, Janette Rodriguez, Sinagrus, Morning Star, Iron Man, A Tyrantrum, Shantae, Trainer Rees, and a bunch of other characters that if the whole list would be said here, the story would only be half of what would be written. Now, the start of this story takes place in the tower mentioned early as it’s a meeting place for all of these characters…) Shovel Knight: I say we build upon this town with gold. Hopefully THEN we’ll be able to trade with neighboring towns. Janette Rodriguez: This ain’t the medieval times, bub, gold won’t get you anywhere. Iron Man: While she is right, gold would be a valuable export to boost sales- (The Tyrantrum roars, shaking the tower) Trainer Rees: Tyrantrum is right, we have no where to export goods! There isn’t even a harbor or an airport. Sinagrus: Furthermore, we don’t have the skills to build any of that. None of us even have the strength! Janette Rodriguez: Really? You lifted something two times the mass of Jupiter, do you know how much that is? Sinagrus: I don’t like work. Morning Star: We can tell. (At that moment, a familiar face busted in through the door) Mewtwo: I’M THE FUCKING KING! (Mewtwo fires a Shadow Ball at Tyrantrum who roars in response.) Iron Man: Oh, Jesus, it’s the fucking human Nazi. Mewtwo: Peasants, I have made a plan to destroy the US and conquer it! First, we build me a castle. Shovel Knight: Oh boy… Mewtwo: And then, a military. Shantae: Impossible. Mewtwo: And then, WE COVER THE WHOLE ENTIRE CAPITOL OF WASHINGTON D.C. IN THE BLOOD OF OUR FIRST BORN CHILDREN! Morning Star: So… what you’re saying is we force a town of random characters to work, and then enroll all of them in a military- Mewtwo: And if they refuse, we shoot them. Morning Star: Right, and then, you want us to procreate like rabbits and kill all of our children just so we can cover a close ally in their blood. Mewtwo: And if we don’t give up there, we will try to conquer North Korea! (Everyone stares in stunned silence until Tyrantrum steps forwards and throws Mewtwo out the window.) Mewtwo: I’ll be back! (A loud crash is heard.) Shovel Knight: So the plan is to build export and import areas? Iron Man: Yes. We should rally everyone today and tell them what we’re going to do tomorrow. (Tyrantrum puts a sign on it’s back saying “Meet up outside the Tower!” and begins to stomp around town while roaring, causing people to look outside their windows.) Steven Universe: *groggily* What’s going on? I need some beauty sleep here! Lincoln the Cat: It’s the prehistoric beast they use to gather everyone. The one that roars and they “know” what it says… *tears up* I could have been the sign holder! (Not really waking everyone up, Tyrantrum goes to the top of the mountain and roars, waking EVERYONE up. Tiki Tong floats over the mountain and glares at Tyrantrum before floating towards the tower. The scene then changes to a stage, podium, and a bunch of seats with all the characters. All the audience members are talking.) Iron Man: Hello, everyone! To day we talk about- hey, listen to me- FUCKING LISTEN TO ME! (The audience ignores Iron Man and Jontron gets up on the stage.) Jontron: Aye, Tony, let me try something. (Iron Man hands Jontron the microphone and he clears his throat before letting out one, big, giant…) Jontron: ECH! (The sound waves throw everyone back onto the ground or into the surrounding trees. Jontron nods to Tony and sits down in the only chair unmoved.) Iron Man: Now that I have your attention, I have an announcement. (All who were blown back into the tree line come out, interested in what Iron Man has to say.) Iron Man: We, because we’re separated from the rest of this country due to being fictional characters or just… whatever, we have created a plan to build our town up from the ground and become a full part of the US. So far, we have been making plans about a harbor and an airport. M. Viridi: Ehh, Señor, there’s a problem with that. Donkey Kong: Yeah, like who’s going to drive the ships and the air planes? None of us are licensed to do it. Iron Man: I’ll drive the planes and hmm… who will drive the- Ruby Rose: Stop right there. You just said you were going to “drive” the plane. Yeah, we need someone who would fly it and not bail out of the cockpit as soon as the plane leaves the ground. The Seeker: Guys, I can literally just build these things with my mind. There is NO need to build these things. The problem is, we just need to find out who would fly and who would steer- Iron Man: We’ll find out the basics later. Everyone, let’s build the harbor and the airport! (After a montage of the harbor and airport being built with multiple shots of citizens working hard, the two buildings have finally been completed and thankfully, they look like a four year old tossed sticks at silly putty and it somehow made the shape of a building. In other words, if someone stepped on it, it would break.) Iron Man: Alright, everyone! The buildings have been complete! Let’s step in side and- (The moment Iron Man’s foot hit the floor, the whole entire airport crumbled and The Seeker just stood there and face palmed. That’s what happens when you spend four days building a place with no one on your crew that has history in making buildings. They spent like, three days on the harbor so just imagine how shitty that is.) Dan Hibiki: How did it fall? Lavos: We worked so hard on this! (Waluigi sunk to his knees and began to cry because he was listed as the number one builder and what he had accomplished had fallen.) Waluigi: WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! (Venus then hugged Waluigi from behind.) Venus: It will be okay… son. Iron Man: Well, everyone, I guess this town will starve… The Seeker: Jesus Christ. (The Seeker snapped his fingers and a finished airport and harbor appeared where the previously built ones were.) Kratos: By the name of Zeus, how did that appear! ???: I know how it was built so quickly… (Mewtwo teleports in front of everyone.) Mewtwo: IT WAS ME, YOUR KING! (Everyone but the council members and The Seeker begin to cheer.) Mewtwo: Now! With my superior building skills and leader ship, we shall erect me a castle! (The council members and The Seeker stand there in utter shock.) Janette Rodriguez: You’re fucking joking… Mewtwo: ONWARDS TO THE NEW LOCATION! (Mewtwo marches at the front of everyone to where the castle will be, the tower.) Sinagrus: Mewtwo, what the fuck! Mewtwo: Tear it down! You there, prehistoric beast! Break it down! (Tyrantrum roars in defiance until Lincoln teleports on top of his head.) Lincoln the Cat: Let’s do this! (Lincoln digs his claws into Tyrantrum’s head and drives him towards the tower, breaking down. Tyrantrum is thrown into the ocean below while Lincoln teleports off just in time.) Shantae: They just KILLED a member of The Council! Is anyone going to do anything- Mewtwo: THROW THE PRISONERS IN THE DUNGEON! (All the council members are thrown into an underground bunker on the other end of the town where all they can do is watch as the castle is built.) Shovel Knight: Did… did they really just do that? Morning Star: Damn bastards. Trainer Rees: I guess we’ll have to sit through this until we’re released. That is, IF we’re released. (A few weeks pass and the castle is finally built and Mewtwo is sitting in the Throne Room. Tapping his fingers on his chair.) Mewtwo: You there, John Cena, bring in the prisoners. John Cena: Nobody orders around John Cena! Mewtwo: I’m your king! John Cena: Oh yeah, that’s right. (John Cena returns a few minutes later with the old Council and The Seeker. They kneel before Mewtwo.) Mewtwo: That’s more like it! Do you pledge your allegiance to me? Janette Rodriguez: Nah. (Janette shoots the wall behind Mewtwo that faces out towards the town. The exploded wall reveals a pissed off Tyrantrum that chomps down onto him and throws him into the town.) Mewtwo: *coughs up blood* Is this how you treat your royal highness? Trainer Rees: Yeah. (Trainer Rees throws a Master Ball at Mewtwo, catching him. He then throws it into the ocean. By the other prisoners join him.) Morning Star: Why didn’t we do that in the first place? They didn’t even take away our equipment. Deadpool: THE WRITER IS CONFUSED ABOUT THIS STORY AND FOR WHATEVER PLOT REASONS, WE’RE ANGRY! (The citizens lead by Deadpool march towards the Council and The Seeker.) Deadpool: YOU HAVE TO PAY THE PRICE FOR KILLING OUR KING! The Seeker: You do realize that I was one who built the airport and harbor out of thin air, right? Deadpool: PROVE IT- (The Seeker snaps his fingers and Deadpool explodes but he regenerates back.) Deadpool: Okay yeah, that’s true. Iron Man: Now, everyone, let’s go back to figuring out who’s able to fly and who’s able to steer. As I said before, I will fly. Spartis: We abandoned that plan and went with Mewtwo’s. Sayaka Miki: Yeah, though I didn’t really agree with the baby part, it was good in the short run… all ninety of them- Morning Star: DID YOU ATTACK THE US AND COVER D.C. IN THE BLOOD OF CHILDREN? Ein: Yes. Sad thing is we only had enough to cover the president. (Flashback to Solid Snake crawling on the ceiling of the Oval Office and dumping a five milk jugs worth of blood on the president before leaving through the window.) Morning Star: DISGUSTING! Now they’re probably coming after us. Solid Snake: No, I covered up my tracks. (Flashback to Solid Snake nailing a sign onto the lawn on the White House before running away. Flashlights shine on it saying “ISIS was here”.) The Seeker: Well anyways, I hope you all learned a valuable lesson in NOT BELIEVING WHAT A LUNATIC SAYS. FUCK THIS I’M GOING HOME. (The Seeker leaves and the crowd disperses. The scene changes to Lincoln on top of a mountain in a hood. Next to him is Mewtwo’s PokeBall and a Pumpkin, also dressed in hoods.) Lincoln the Cat: Oh great lord, Galactus! Please, answer our calls of despair! Free us from the curse that is The Seeker and The Council that rain unjust laws against us like building stuff to help the town! We thank you, lord Galactus- (Tiki Tong bursts from a hole in the side of the mountain and slaps the three off of the mountain. Lincoln lands first on his feet, then Mewtwo’s PokeBall falls and hits him on the head, and then the Pumpkin lands gently on his back, knocking Lincoln out. Tiki Tong grunts almost as though he’s laughing and returns to his home.) How was this episode? Good Bad Category:Blog posts